Christmas in Jurrasic Park

I went with anna to Christmas in the prado, we were so set with wine in a thermos and cute peacoats. We walked forever and saw little lights but a lot of people, couples all around the nativity scene, baby mexicans playing with light sabers in the trees,and us drinking wine by a bush.We walked around the Prado restaurant and i was in awe of the ballroom, so beautiful. Later We walked to an art show and met some of annelises friends there. Her friend ross and some of his friends found some empty bottles that we went to go throw in the alley, which i want to be my new past time by the way. The art show shared a lot with these abandon houses so we jumped the fence to go investigate. we found a piano that had played its last song so I kept a key and ross gave me the doorknob, which we then put in the middle of the street and got excited every time a car would hit it and wed hear the rattle of it bouncing toward the curb. Simple pleasures. We went back into the art show and this psychadelic/dreamlike/indie band was on and I couldn’t take my eyes off the drummer. It was one of those things where when I looked at him I got a flash of our life and it was bizarre. I tried to find him after the set but he was gone and we had to leave so I just confessed my love in the guestbook and left my phone number, like a real life missed connection. I gave the doorknob to this kid Allister who really seemed to appreciate dented heavy scrap metal, then somehow we got to chad Michael murrays twins house where he shaved off annelises hair.
Then to another house where i watch people play nintendo 64 and actually start counting the freckles on my arm.

DUMBLEDORE..... is dead.

I have been waiting so long for the Harry Potter premiere that after it had happened i had nothing else to look forward to for the rest of my existence, except for maybe Part 2 and my funeral. Before we got to the theater we tried the new Five Guys burger place and the only good thing was the free peanuts( i think we were allowed to throw the shells on the ground so i did this violently and a little asian employee ran over real fast and sweeped them up, making me feel like a guilty pig.)the burgers were good, but the signs saying "#1 in the country" were presumptuious and im pretty sure theyd never had innout because all the comments were NOT from california. We go to the theater to wait in line at 7 and luckily some of rachels friends were already in line so we met up with them. then it was time to ENERGIZE! we drank redbull, redbull shots, monsters, rockstars, batteryacid, and 5 hour energy to stay up for the movie.WHY? i can easily stay up until 3 everyother night without liquid adrenaline but i tried it and was shaky/spastic and had to pee every 15 minutes.We ran around the line and did wand battles and there was actually a real duel where people lined up dressed in slytherin on one side and gryfindor on the other and would one by one duel with spells and then act it out. there was also a guy that was identical to voldemort. By the time the movie started i was shaky and had to pee every 10 minutes.when youve been waiting for a movie for 5 hours.. scratch that, 5 years, and then when its about to come on the screen and you have to go pee its the worst feeling ever. i felt somewhat better that other people were about to piss their pants too but I was stuck in the middle of the row! agh i hate being that person shuffling by and rubbing my ass in your face while youre trying to watch a movie. Harry potter part 1 was everything i wanted it to be, but there were some funky parts. i didnt know the black smoke from fern gully was gonna bust out of the locket with a dewy naked hermione. Dobby had some great one liners. When we went home i couldnt sleep so i just read the whole second half of the book again. it was a lot of fun, now we just have to wait for part 2.............

!

Martha's B-Day 10-09-1985 from New Picture Agencies on Vimeo.

Jennifer Lopez - If You Had My Love

thoughts

you really should create a completely unique chain of moves and sounds everyday to give your life a little spontinaety( garden state?)2nd grade timmy fron arkansas did that move in 2003. youre not original.

when you try to be so quiet and youve finally laid in your bed and a pen drops and it sounds like an atomic bomb. and you think your parents are listening to you with their ear on the door listening to your every cough,the smell of your room and whats in your purse and pockets. they dont really care. and their hearings going.

think of the people who originally built the house and how it was their dream home. thats why its so cool if houses are passed dow from generation so their lineage gets to experience their past generations dream or strive to achieve a higher goal.

i love pizzzzzzaasasdsdsADS[OHIGOH[IEGOJVJ]Ua


i just added those random letters so you can imaging me going mad ape shit on the keyboard.and just so you(YOU) know i actually DID do that so what your imagining is the truth. straight up. SOMETIMES I USE MY GHETTOoops slang around blaack people and i tell racist jokes but forget im surrounded my black kids. i think they should have a reality show where someone yells racsit jokes while theirsurrounded by said race. they have to be horrible and extremely tasteless so theres a big dramatic reaction. ex " did you know there are black people in our family tree?"

really?"
"yeah theyve been hanging there for years."

and you just see what happens.
ideas from the mind of a genius.
yeah, walk away.

pizza.
so dense. :)

I hella left my heart there

These past weeks ive had some really great calls and skypes from all my friends from San Francisco. Its weird, sometimes i forget how easy it is to make friends. Im glad I picked the right ones! Miss the SHIT out of you guys and ill be visiting soon :)God you guys are amazing. You have filled my awkward/hilarious/favorite spaces of my memory to the brim. haha oh you crazy fucks.....

Bug Juice

I get to school about 5 minutes late and walk into my art class a couple minutes late and some random lady in a muumuu is standing on the table. i get my easel and sit down and look up and she is taking her underwear off and the muumuu goes flying! I had forgotten that we were done with portraits and moving on to live models so my sleep daze had now turned into full alertness with this naked woman in front of me.It didn't scare me but the surprise of it sure as hell woke me up. Its interesting how nudity completely changes form when its in the name of "ART". Why do people think its so weird/disgusting? Not saying that i would do it(they make bank though, $50 per hour)but it really bothered me when the model took a break and everyone was saying they were shaking because they were nervous or uncomfortable sketching a naked person.getovahit. We actually had two dayswith 2 different models and i actually preferred sketching the chubbier one because she gives you more lines in her skin, and the skinny one wore really tacky jewelry.anyways...



Rachels volleyball banquet was after class and as team captain she gave out gag awards to all her teammates. It was my job to collect a jar full of rollie pollie bugs for Nayeli since she does those cool rolls on the court. I was ok with this job, until i realized that the stupid bugs migrated out of pb or something so it became an all out bug hunt. My dad and i went to his moms house and she had already started turning over every rock she could.Found 3.As a kid i felt like i could find hundreds in our garden! the hunt got scary a couple times when i got slugs and spiders on me, but i wasnt going to come home with only 3gray little shitballs.
we got up to about 14 and a half dead one. They were actually the scary jurrasic kind that are flatter, not like the round cute ones. The solution to less rollie pollies? smaller jar! see, shes so happy with her jar of bugs!

C'mon you asian child laborers, show me what youre working with!......Oooh large machinery?

If youre a youtube fanatic I'm guessing Bo Burnham is something familiar to you. If you dont know who he is and love vulgar tasteless puns put to talented piano-tickling then youll soon have a bo obsession as well. He has no boundaries, from epilepsy,tampons, hitler, aids, and dick jokes to infinity AND beyond. So obviously this makes him appealing to me, because if its offensive, its golden! I went to the show with my friends megan and mitch at SOMA. I just cant believe that this kid who was playing a keyboard in his room is now a touring one man show. He is extremely talented and i loved that to everything the audience shouted, he had an instant joke or reply that was hysterical, i mean he bumped into a stool and made an irritable bowel sydrome joke! just super clever shit. But now i finally have my biggest regret of my life. I had the opportunity to stand in line after the show and meet him but the line was long and i get oddly nervous so we just left. WHY WHY WHY Some day we'll meet again bo. and ill stand there with nothing to say and a smile bigger than a cheshire and say "gsdlgkdmfgvpomolfdsad;slc,eprosldcs;slasdfoidjg" so he'll never fucking forget my crazy ass. If im lucky he'll make a personal helen keller joke!


"rosa parks didnt call shotgun!"

see more Historic LOL

"Welcome to MYANUS! i mean yours?"

real life choose your own adventure: go to Disneyland and Hollywood with your sister and mom OR stay home to go to your friends Uranus themed birthday party and a bo burnham concert? I miss my friends birthday every year so i knew that i had to go and not only that, i had to be a stellar mascot for her party. We were putting away halloween costumes a week ago and my dad handed me this white crunchy suit and i actually told him i would never wear it unless i wanted to pretend i was on a hazmat team( OK, it would've been a little funny after the mercury scare at MBHS)but the night before the party i was looking at my old drawings and BOOM Astronaut. really? how was that not the first thing i thought of? so i took the suit, 3 rolls of electric tape, my dads old white BMX helmet and sharpies and got to work. after 3 hours and a lot of moon walking practice i finished my space suit. i forget that when i actually dedicate my time im in love with what i create!


The day of the party megan comes over and dresses as an illegal alien and i put on my suit for her and we just laugh as i pretend to sit down because i cant bend my body into anything less than 130 degrees so i flop around on the bed asking "is this seat taken?" and then attempt to sit and fail, rolling off the bed. then she starts talking about how i think snow angels are dumb, so i pretend to do one, dumbly, and open my legs really wide and i hear this horrible ripping noise. i look down and i tore the entire crotch out of my suit. NOW I CAN NEVER GO TO SPACE! this was the moment in my life that i remember was my first real laughsohardbecausethisisfunnyasshitbutyoujustworkedsohardandnowallnightyouwillhear"easyaccessjokes"soitsoktocrybutpretenditsfromlaughingextremelyhard moments. it was a mixed blessing. now i got air flow to my legs so i wasnt going to faint in the party which was lovely. but i had forgotten that to get to the party i had to sit. in a car.at a 90 degree angle.marstits. so when i sat there were two more loud sssshpppppfffssss noises for a rip under each buttock. peachy. but annelise was really happy that i had dressed up even though i was getting all weathered and we hadnt even left PB yet.

we drove up and when we went in mele gave us a tour and there was an empty room with black light and what felt like 100s of glow in the dark stars! onother room had silver streams in a circle shape that made people fall into its gravitational pull and yell "beam me up SCOTTY!" its kind of weird having attention on you when your anonymous i felt like i could act completely mental but there were too many people who knew it was me and it was bound to get hot in there so i had to take the helmet off( that became the token peice of the party! people would trade it, smack their friend in the head real hard,make funny gestures trying to drink beer, do the floating stance/robot then pass it off to another couple guys etc.etc. This kid patrick did this chain of reactions when i was next to him but added 2 more steps 1)start yelling at us in tongues 2) snap my American flag pole in half then run away screaming. this was the first hate crime ever commited on an astronaut. some more stuff happened, floated around, peopple giggled, i hung out with mitch and brian and we stuck pin the tail on the donkey stickers on everyones asses, more people giggled. The Watoosies played. I got stuck with a drunk ass bitch (dab) who wanted to share a cab to pb so i said yes whatever, she looked reliable. she gets wasted. she gets full of vomit and tries to put it everywher and when they ask who is her friend she points to me spacy girl. FUCK. itd be fine if she : was a friend, knew her address, knew her name. so megan and i had to tell abdul that she wouldnt blow chunks all overs his fancy cab. since i lost $20 in another attempt to get home(flat tire) i only had enough to get to brueggers. wed passed dabs house but she couldnt physically walk. we asked for her moms number and she gave us hers then got really excited when her phone would ring she got excited, not realizing. her mom came to pick her up and thankfully gave us a ride home the extra 7 blocks at 3am.


live long and prosper, just say no to 4loko.

You like Mike & Ikes?

You know how i know your ghetto? you went to a club called "Blaq Star" on El Cajon Blvd. so this happened on thursday and i couldnt have been more out of place.except if i were in Compton. It was in this room that looked like a rec room with hookahs everywhere, a DJ (who went to Mission Bay) and the oddest mix of people. I dont remember much other than when "whip my hair" played i was ecstatic and the green lasers were the best invention i had ever seen. I got tired from dancing like a prostitute so i took a breather and this black kid with the cheeto twist hair came up to me and told me "I liked how you shake dat ass out there" Not the best pick up line to use on me but it made me laugh. He sat down really close to me and i swear to god the next line put me in hysterics and i couldnt believe this was happening to me. He followed up with," so we should hang out outta dis place so i can see yo pretty face again.... CAN I HAAAAA YO NUMBA?" . eyes buldging, neck straining, in my face and i just sat there laughing and mumbling about my imaginary boyfriend George and blah blah but he started insisting really forcefully and not backing down. i panic in those situations and blanked on a fake number and just gave him my real one so he texted me the rest of the night and got no responses. God that makes me feel like such a bad person but i dont think we were that compatible, but an ass compliment from him was a high honor.

texts about pie need to be answered

like in a couple days because so much shit is going on!Today was horrible. I woke up late, forgot my parking pass, felt sick, had to leave early before my pass expired, texted kevin at a red light because when i left the teacher passed back our tests(and we were talking about how badly we wanted julian apple pie haha). The light turns green and i hear a WOOOP WOOOP and i get pulled over for texting and driving AT A RED LIGHT! I really dont like when people text and drive, seriously, im a firm believer, but looking at your phone when the car isnt moving?wtf? it didnt teach me not to text, it taught me to look for cops next time. whatever. i threw my phone against the passenger door and the back fell off ( ok im a little too strong when i get nervous)but he knew and he had the advantage of the sun blinding my eyes so i couldnt even tell if he looked gullible or not to believe i had my head bowed for a breif meditation(probably give me a ticket for that too.). I didnt cry because my crying face would have doubled the fine. He did say he cut me some slack on the price but i dont give 2 shits or three fucks, if he really wanted to help he wouldnt have given me a ticket.

But since i was sick and emotional i sobbed heavily all the way home like this ticket mattered AGH. Ofcourse my mother cant sympathize without disciplining me first, "well if you had your wallet you would have had enough money to stay at class and this never would have happened!" gee, mother. i feel so relieved now that i know this could have been avoided but because of my bad life choices i ran into it head on! i was such an idiot, thank you for your gentle guidance! SIKE

i have a presentation and test tomorrow which added to the breakdown. i cant wait until its all over so i can go to a wand making party and the premiere of HP!

My moms birthday gift

that we share with the world. It's like its your birthday too!





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Yv6ww_blN8

Awktober

The best smells in PB always come in October, and the best holiday! Nuche and i went to Vons and got a good dozen pumpkins to bring home and carve.



the best part is slapping your friend with the pump guts. i asked her to put my hair up because my hands were dirty, and she says" this is the picture of a perfect friendship in any and every lifetime movie." hah

move it in front of your face. perfect!

mines the moon

I forget, that like so many other holiday traditions, that carving pumpkins sounds way more fun than it ever is( ex: snowball fights leave your face stinging from that asshole behind you yelling SURPRISE, jumping in piles of leaves hurts a lot when your dad leaves the rake at the bottom,christmas cookie decoratingYAY! "20 cookies?" "no, 300." Shit., snow angels? dumb. it looks like someone just explained jumping jacks to you and you didnt understand.)

The next day i went to the school and donated blood and made bloody popcorn(coincidence?) with melted red hots and brought some down to the PB rec halloween carnival. You can guess what Karl would dress up as...

veryy fucking appropriate.

mike wazzawskiii

this was a real game hahaha




waittt, is that? KARL STOOOOOP IT!!!!




Chipmans front yard. He built a scene of an alien spaceship crashing into no on D signs. Aliens support higher taxes, this is there way of protest.
then Dad and I went to kate sessions and found some iceblocks...

It sucks being busy

And its not like i even have a job or anything right now, im just working on gifts for peoples birthdays and im editing 3 videos(1 for school where my grandma flips off a plane, and 2 for fun) Id rather be blogging. I feel like i put so much effort into gifts and then i get shafted aghhhhh. ive also been busy watching rachel play volleyball every tuesday and thursday. She had two articles in the newspapers this week! one in the Tribune and another in the beach & bay. Im really proud of her and her team for doing so well this season. for some reason they all keep saying she is like an avatar with tennis rackets for hands?thats a compliment... wtf?


ill be back soon, if youve been waiting. sorriez:)

Don't hit me, I'll hit me!

the cutest sign off on a blog or video it to say happy birthday, because someone, somewhere is having a birthday and you are going to surprise the shit straight out of them. Oh and does anyone remember hey arnolds crazy dance? I was talking about bullying with my cousin and i told him if anyone tries to mess with you, just go batshit crazy and smash plates on your head. its foolproof.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvtvV95EQLQ

OK GO

This has been one of the most eventful weekends ive had in a while because i actually left the house. On thursday i went to a gym class with Annelise and megan and i have never been worked so hard.I actually was doing these push ups on half of an excercise ball and i slipped and hit myself in the face. It gets late so we just start asking eachother giiiirly questions like "omg like so who would you totally bang out of every man in the universe?" and we fumble with the generic answers...well I did. george clooney, ryan gosling, annelise is actually planning on becoming Mrs. Jason segal now that she knows hes only 30. Im changing my answer to Damien the lead singer for OK GO,because i slept on it. not him. but now you know i want to.
We went on an adventure to pick up a drunk asian friend and realized super fast that he was too drunk because he tried to go out the car door when it was closed and his head bounced off the glass like those crows in the windex commericals.Drove him around pb and got handfed orange slices and kisses on the cheek. I felt like a pampered geisha.
etc.etc. it got wierd.

Rachel had a volleyball team bonding slumberparty at our house and it was adorable. I love how when you have a team its like instant friends. you spank eachothers asses and its destiny. Sooooo i came home from the surf club party to see them all on the couch with the ziploc full of charades scraps that my mom made when we were kids with obscure movies like "Driving Miss Daisy" and "Last of the Mohicans", every 10 year olds favorites. Then the girls all went to boba and Lazer tag where julia and i had the brilliant plan to draw on our faces with highlighters before we went into the blacklight. we looked hella tribal. The kids who went in before us were all wearing glowsticks and put them on the gamemaster who gave them to us so we got all decked out! Went home and had a glowstick danceparty and ate sundaes. These girls are so fun! i have to remember that theyre rachels friends and im there to half ass chaperone and not really be part of the party, but its SO HARD. Its weird because when i see their team together it reminds me of when that was me and all my teammates just having shits and giggles. Now everyones so far away and making new best friends and its hard not to get really nostalgic watching Rachel live out her senior year and make all those excitingly bad choices(allegedly), thats what high schools about. Right? right.


Chipman took me geocaching around PB. we found one over by Seaworld. It was a little Altoid tin painted black and inside was a log book with all the previous finders names and dates, 2 melted now & laters and a rubber spider. I'm hoping for a better cache next time... DREAM BIG.


Im addicted to skins.
UK tv series like if Degrassi was uncensored and people were actually attractive. Sid and cassie.Sid and Cassie. Sid and Cassie. I cant get them out of my mind


And i love that my house has so much random shit that the day before halloween i can find all the fixin's for an Indiana Jones costume (even a whip! even though its more of the sexual kind with all the tassles.... i asked my dad for it and he located it unusually fast.)