Dump it to Crump it

Today in my Africa class my teacher was talking about growing up as a little black girl im Richmond, Virginia in the 1960's. She told this story about this white girl who was always nice to her named margie gables. One day in Choir practice when they were sharing a music book, Margie turned to her and whispered, "wheres your tail?" "what do you mean MY TAIL?" "all negroes have tails dont they? they just coil it up during the day and stick it in their buttcrack..." I dont get how someones idea of another race could be that skewed to the point where they werent human but monkeys! wtf were Margies parents telling her? I wanted to laugh so hard but i think this scarred my teacher, like when she got a hot comb dropped down her back.She was going to burn down the school with all her other black friends but then the cops came so they raided a convienience store for beer but she just stole a snickers. ill restrain from the racist jokes but i thought that was really interesting. She also said white girls smoking in the bathroom used to lock her in the stall and light balls of toilet paper on fire and toss them over. I found flaws in this. wouldnt it not burn that well unless they were like gasoline wads? i call bullshit. Went to Nations again today and im going to birth a food baby. im so full disturbing.
Im flying in tomorrow evening and im on the same flight with my roommate so thats pretty sick. Get to see my beautiful family and ugly friends and just kick it for a week doing absolutely nothing. VERY EXCITE to have some good times and belly aching laughter coming soon!




I didnt realize i make this pose so much. what an obnoxious face... i couldnt find a pic of everyone so we need to have one taken over break, maybe we can do it oldschool and go to Starshots.

Bothered

copy cat fisssshes! BOTHERED why am I watching lost right now? im slowly becoming sucked in but have absolutely no clue as to whats happening.I guess thats like everyone else who has been following since the beginning. Im also trying to write a paper on walt whitman and emily dickinson which is moving slowly but i really like the poem im analyzing. its about drunk ass bees, well not actually but the idea of a hammered bee getting kicked out of a flower bar is pretty amusing. oooh such imagery! haha emily dickinson is a silly bitch, read the poem if you like:

I taste a liquor never brewed,
From tankards scooped in pearl;
Not all the vats upon the Rhine
Yield such an alcohol!

Inebriate of air am I,
And debauchee of dew,
Reeling, through endless summer days,
From inns of molten blue.

When the landlord turn the drunken bee
Out of the foxglove's door,
When butterflies renounce their drams,
I shall but drink the more!

Till seraphs swing their snowy hats,
And saints to windows run,
To see the little tippler
Leaning against the sun!

today i packed, did laundry, worked on a statistics project and pretended to be really stressed. i act like i have so much to do when if i actually just sit down and do what im dreading it takes 20 min and my mind wont be so foggy and i can breathe easier. I feel like my head is full of squashed flies at the moment, Except one thats rattling around and making my brain pound.

Abnormally Normal

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

i can haz cheezburger? in chip form?

So the most amazing thing happened to me today.. i discovered cheeseburger flavored doritos.
you:"ewwwwwwwwfreaky!"
me: "stfu and eat one"
you "wow it actually tastes like a burger!"
me "and the shnozzberries taste like shnozzberries!"

this gem of a chip is life changing.and they smell like pickles, what a bonus!
possibly better than jalepeno cheetos.

SPEAKING OF FOOD... totally went baking crazy yesterday and made chocolate chip cookies and jenny made french bread and we pigged out. And went to this burger place called Nations that might be better than in n out... i know, the idea that theres something possibly better than innout is thrilling, but they only have them in nor cal.

Went to a jewish estate sale and bought nice luggage and green bowls. this house was a TRIP. every room was blast from the past with shag carpets and floral wallpaper, i regret not having my camera because it was real neat. I cant wait to go home and paint my room this sea foam green color that i saw there. i also got this weird plaque that says, "Womens faults are many, yet men have only two,everything they say, and everything they do." i wonder how much they paid for it when they originally bought it and WHY they did.

Berkeley this weekend for Sonyas roommates oldies party! I came over the night before and we made skittle vodka. The party was all guys! beautiful berkeley guys screaming to Boheimian Rhapsody with lots of thrashing those beautiful heads around. All of her roommates are supah fly and i love going over there to visit even if bart takes 3 hours. the parties are awesome and people are actually friendly there as opposed to the noseintheskyandcoke hipsters of SF. Yes i have met some amazing (truly) friends here but you have to search,in berkeley its like everybody wants to be your buddy. i had new cowboy boots and they smelled so damn delicious, that could be another reason.

picture from the photo shoot with alicia wearing my derishious boots! lol tiny sarah

Chevy to the Levy

young Chevy Chase is everything i want in a man. just look at him... soak in the sex appeal.... funny as shit and oh so handsome. People ask me my type and now i want to know for myself what it is. I appreciate the underdogs in movies, i mean I used to love Gordo from lizzie Mcguire and how he fawned over her and she was SO STUPID and had no clue. wake up bitch, hes obsessed! but then i looked him up now... hes like a SUPER JEW.


anyways, now im on the search for my favorite looking celebrities. I have a couple in mind but its all the younger versions of old people. i cant find anyone worthy of my drool in todays media other than eric foreman and he doesnt even look like that in reality agh!
mmmm young bud cort, young corey feldman, young john cusack, josh brolin, harrison ford....

My Dark Ass Aura...

This day was awesome. I made my roommate Alicia a bitchin card for her birthday with a psychic and a crystal ball on it because we were taking her to one. woohooo! at the beginning of the day Sarah and I modeled for Alicias photo class and worked our sexy little and big asses.We took pictures on this giant staircase that was made of mosaics. PURTY. then we went to the Castro to have Thai food and that was quaint, but the most interesting was when we went to the psychic (ok trick to spelling psychic, psycho etc. say it like pussy-cho in your head. I dont know why i spell this so much either but thats how me and rach remember it!) Last time i want to a pussycho I was told i had a veeeeery dark Aura, like basically a little storm cloud raining on me daily. but that lady was a total jip because she said shed cleanse it for 20 dollars because she saw the $ in my pocket. So i go to get my palm read and the woman says that my Aura is dark but not in a negative way, but more mysterious like a burgundy because im different and have a strange personality and like uncommon things. She said I had a lot of stress lines which I took as my strange paranoias and love to create worst case scenarios in my head and then worry the shit out of myself about them. anyways, she said my love life was underdeveloped, Im not ready for real love yet and that i am afraid to go into things without fully analyzing the pros and cons first. but it will develop! in a year and a half when im ready. she was super on top of it! career will develop in 3 years. ehh thats all i remember but WOW, like normally i think that stuff is a hoax but she read me really well... Im a single paranoid weirdo.

Other than little shit like the lines on my hand, more serious things are happening. My dad just got in a serious car accident on the freeway and rolled his car multiple times and hit two trees.My family isnt even shaken because they are so used to my dad getting hurt and being, well, stupid. When i called him he seemed very calm and not like hed been through a tramatic crash ending in totaled car. they tried to take him to the hospital but he wouldnt go and dad said that they were looking for the corpse because they said there was NO WAY someone could make it out of a crash like that alive. Dad calls me bitching about how he might have to pay for the trees he fucked up, oblivious to how amazing it is that hes just buised and missing a few teeth. DAD just be happy your alive and that you killed trees not babies! i mean shit, it has to have been a miracle, he has almost died so many times I think he might actually be immortal. like hercules and he never drank the last drop...




"Fuck you, death."

She's got the crabs dear, and I don't mean Dungeoness!.

Midterms are coming. lots of projects and papers to fill my head and make me unable to concentrate on procrastinating because im too busy thinking about what i should be doing. For example, i have a math test in two hours and right now im blogging and watching Mrs. Doubtfire. Last weekend was blog worthy. I went to the Chinese New Year parade with my roommates and took pictures that could be in National Geographi, like this....



Those kids make me want to steal a Gosselin.

























we went to sushi after with Alicias stepbrother Caleb and his friend and that was nice too. I cant even write normally right now, the idea of studying is hurting my head right now, i cant even IMAGINE the pain in my brain when i actually open the book. Pouring again. I think E.T. is one of my new favorite movies. just throwing that out there.
countdown to spring break is about to start! WHOOPIE