Giggle Puss

F-f-f-f-freezing friday. Today i finished this STOOPID math project on STOOPID excel with my STOOPID vista pc. ugh. Other than that im working on journaling and adding to my Bucket List. I have this ridiculous wish since i was a little kid to milk a cow. why? No idea. Maybe i have an obsession with phallic objects or i like milk a lot, either way its something i need to accomplish. Fireflies have always fascinated me to so i want to catch some of those and make a trip with my sister Rachel to Alaska to see the Northern Lights. Visiting the seven continents would be nice but i think thats too ambitious for me, thats other peoples dreams, but shit if i have the money ill do everything. I was watching Lost the other day and i was thinking when people ask you "if you were stranded on an island, what would you bring?" why does nobody ever say BOAT? dont bring your iPod or a ration of food that will last you a month. Im not feeling like my cute witty self today, but tomorrow should be better because its the chinese new years parade! yay AZNS. Oh and another phrase I use from my parents that no one knows.. giggle pusses. someone who giggles uncontrollably? thats going in the dictionary with katuchi, negrobilia and lollylater. dont be CHARKIN. :)

Keep lookin up

Thank you! Please come again and again...

Thursday should be named "that day that dissappointed you because you woke up and thought it was Friday". Had a really weird dream last night about this warehouse that had a parallel universe kind of like Coraline but i was hanging out with myself and having fun. I dont know why my dreams have been so strange lately but they are always extremely entertaining and wish i remembered them better. I havent had my reoccuring Shamu dream in a while, but maybe thats a good thing because now these Killer Whales are on KILLING SPREES? Did you hear about the trainer that got thrashed around during a show and died at the Seaworld in Orlando? man good thing that didnt happen in PB.
Today after school we went down to Castro to mess around and go to erotic shops which i cant handle because my maturity age is in the negatives. I didnt realize how many fun toys there are, and half of them i had no idea what hole they were supposed to go in. :0 my favorite are the extemely lifelike rubber fists and the shirts that say " I like long walks on the beach,light jazz and COCK IN MY ASS". after that we went to Naan & Curry and ate... those two things and laughed about dildos. Changed a lightbulb, night walk to 7-11 for some ben and jerrys and went home to be let down with a repeat of Project Runway. Talked to my mom before her trip to Paris and she listed off all the people shed come home for in the middle of her trip for if they died.im glad i was one of them? "oh ya, if you died id come home from my trip, probably not soandso, but definately for you." Thanks mom. :) also that i could find a nice boy at a computer lab.

Teenage Wasteland

Oh today is so gloomy!Another day semi-wasted on the couch waiting for the rain to go away so I can do SOMETHING other than sit on my ass and pretend like im getting things done. On monday when i woke up i was excited because i had made plans to go to Alcatraz (which once in a while i slip and call it Azkaban and realize thats NOT where i want to take a trip to in the near future)so i opened my window and stood on my bed delighted that contrary to my roomates forcast of rain for the next 10 days, it was a gorgeous day! I bust out into the living room and shouted, " ITS A PERFECT DAY FOR ALCATRAZ!". Major letdown when they all said they had homework and they couldnt go. BOTHERED. ugh and now it has been drizzling ever since so I obviously cant to anything except sit on my ass and watch movies on youtube. Today I watched Rocket Man and i forgot how ridiculously cheeseball but so funny. I love when he paints the Sistine Chapel using the tubes of space food as paint. Made some bomb pasta with nacho sauce and Sriracha then watched Marie Antoinette and wished i could live in a classy time, or just be rich and eat raspberries and pastries in big dresses all day. Kirsten Dunst really is pretty minus her fangs. Youtube, youtube, youtube. it makes me so YOUseless ha. i have become obsessed with the 5awesomegays after following Tyler Oakley and the Princess Peach Diaries where this fabulous gay guy dresses in a hannah montana wig and talks about "that bitch Daisy!" please go watch some! I think I need a new hobby other than "internet". I've been drawing on and off but i never finish things because I wait for better ideas to come to me instead of just completing it. Blogging? we'll see.It might have to be since im looking towards more days that are not so perfect for Alcatraz, but pretty dandy for the couch and my laptop.

Keep looking up,
Ash

PS. Jesus loves you, but only sometimes.

Hey World! I'm Ashley Rhoades and this is my bahlowg. Get ready for a thrilling reading adventur... ok maybe not TOO crazy, but i do have some strange things that happen in my life that I'm sure people will be interested in, right?! So lets start this again, I'm Ashley aka Aflack, ash, BFG (Big Friendly Giant... or Fucking, whatever you prefer) I'm 6'1", left handed,I love peanut butter and pickle sandwiches and I can do that really cool Indian call with my hands cupped together. Other than that there’s nothing too crazy with my life. I do not sky diving, spear fishing, and/or running on hot coals and I don't aspire to be a rock star or anything like that, I'm just pleased with living and seeing where life takes me. I love Harry Potter, Forrest Gump,Sound of Music, and Titanic and I’m really annoying to watch those movies with because I will quote them non-stop. “leviosa not leviosaaaah”. See? its super obnoxious.
I love to cheat at card games, especially Apples to Apples, I will always hide the Helen Keller card in my lap and win EVERYTIME.
My favorite word is “catawampus” because the word itself looks like it means, just a spastic mess.thats kind of what i am with my train of thought sometimes so be warned. What’s that saying? “A jack of all trades, a king of none”? that’s me. I’m never the best at something, always 3rd or 4th best, but that’s fine with me because I don’t like too much attention, unless I’m choking or something, because then I’d really like some attention. if you couldn't tell I also try to be funny. HAHA

Ok that was just a random ramble, this blog needs some substantial foundation. I'm from Pacific Beach San Diego which I ADORE, but the town is slowly being consumed by bros and the tons of tattoo shops and foriegn men in pinstripe shirts and designer jeans hitting the bars and on underage girls. I love my parents as wacky as they may be and my sisters not to bad herself. JK shes FEROSH in a good way not a blood hungry tiger way. She is my other half and we have enough inside jokes to fill an almanac and piss our parents off because they cant decode out conversations.Shes the kid whos destined to go somewhere, and when she gets there im going to be there in her mansion freeloading. My dad is the original BFG, he is like a sensitive frankenstein who has to be the funniest person in my life and always puts things into perspective in a way that retarded me can understand them.He also got me into collecting things which is both good and bad.:) Mom is fabulous too. if she could afford to cover our house in Swarovski crystals... well she would have done it already. shes such a sparkle nut! She works at the Airport so thats cool. after 10 years she gets to fly for free. SHWEET . My dog abby is mentally disabled i think. shes cute. but so so stupid. I go to San Francisco State right now and am majoring in Creative Writing because i really want to write childrens books and have no other major goals right now other than to be happy and explore the city. San fran is so wacky and the people here, well, I wont forget them, thats for sure. A city where I could be in the Olympics for the sport of People Watching. I think thats it for now because im scared that my PC is going to shut down and loose everything. SHUT UP MACS.
i need a super cool sign off...
Stay bitchin! no? ill think of another later BYE